It’s raining out. I love the rain, usually, but today I’m feeling “rainy” on the inside so it’s not helping that it’s raining outside too. I have a bright green shirt on today in hopes of feeling a little sunshine! I’m exhausted and don’t know why. It gets harder and harder every day to leave my baby at home while I go to work and be bored all day. I feel like a gerbil on a wheel just doing the same thing day in and day out with no reprieve or hope for something different. I don’t mean to be so down. I shouldn’t wait to write my blog only when I’m feeling down.
I’ve been asking the Lord a lot in the last few days, “when?” When will we be released from here? When will we get to move on? When will our time in Hillsdale County come to a close? When will churches call? When will the economy get better so they WILL call? When? When? When? Oh, how the Lord must get tired of my whining!
The verse, “do everything without grumbling or complaining” has been running through my mind a lot! Have you ever noticed how much grumbling and complaining enters your day? I have! I seem to grumble and complain without even realizing I’m doing it. I grumble when the alarm clock goes off in the morning; I grumble that I have to go to work; I grumble that I’m bored at work; I grumble that I can’t get to bed any earlier. Boy, I must be such a joy to be around!!! Grumble, grumble, grumble. And, I tell myself that it’s OK to complain about these things. I mean, 6:00 is too early to be out of bed. I don’t want to go to work, and my going to work means my husband hasn’t found a job. I want a job that keeps me busy from the time I get there until the time I go home. It’s OK to want to go to bed early, right? It might help with the alarm clock grumbling! 🙂 And yet, no matter how much I justify my complaining it’s still wrong. I’m told to do EVERYTHING without grumbling or complaining–some versions say arguing or complaining. Wow. It’s hard. It’s so much easier to just complain the day away. But, it’s not right. I need to also remember the verse, “rejoice in the Lord always; I say it again, rejoice!” Quite the opposite of grumbling, huh?
Lord, help me today to be happy and content with where you have us right now. I don’t understand why we’re still here or why David hasn’t found a job, but that’s life right now. Help me to rejoice always.