Unfortunately, this has become a typcial conversation in our house lately:
David: Why are you being so grouchy?
Me: I’m NOT! (said in a very grouchy tone)
David: Yes, you ARE!
Me: Well, I’m grouchy now that you keep saying I am!
Unfortunately, my husband is right. (Shhhhhh! Don’t tell him, it’ll only go to his head! 🙂 ) I have been a grouch. I’ve been malcontent, grouchy, touchy and just no fun to be around. I snap my answers, huff and puff around, roll my eyes (stop laughing, Ruthie) and am just generally not a nice, let alone fun, person to be around! Why am I doing this? I mean, I’m usually the “glass is 1/2 full” person, the one who can laugh at everything/anything, the woman who always sees a silver lining. What is my problem? I mean, I have a husband who loves me, a daughter who is so sweet and fun, a dog who never ceases to bring laughter, a family who loves me, a warm, dry house, food in the cupboards, clothes in my closet, a job…why am I being such a grouch?
I think it all comes down to pride. Don’t most things in life usually come down to pride? I may have all these wonderful things, but I don’t have the 1 thing I really want. And, that one thing is for my husband to have a job so I can stay at home and take care of our daughter and our home in general. I don’t want to be the one leaving the house every day (today was especially hard) and leave my husband to do the things I’m supposed to be doing. I want things to go my way. Wow. How selfish is that? How proud does that sound? I think very much on both accounts. And so, instead of just dealing with life as it is right now I have chosen to deal with it by being a grouch. I could give Oscar a run for his money.
But, this is not how we’re supposed to be, is it? I mean, God doesn’t tell us to just be however you want when life doesn’t go the way you planned, does he? Nope. He tells us to “consider it pure joy when you endure trials of many kinds.” WHAT?????? JOY??????? Are you SERIOUS????????? How in the world am I supposed to find joy in this journey? How am I supposed to “rejoice in the Lord always?” I mean, God must have had a “senior moment” when he wrote those things. And yet, it’s true.
This whole year has been stretching for me (and my husband) in many ways. But I think one of the biggest ways is finding joy no matter what the circumstance. I have really struggled to find that joy, to be thankful, to rejoice always. I don’t know why. I mean, the Lord has blessed us greatly this past year (as always). We have never wanted for anything.
I have been making huge efforts to not be a grouch. I have taken to praying on my way home from work that when I step through the door at home I will be genuinely happy and joyful. It’s not my husband’s fault the job market is so terrible. It’s not my daughter’s fault we’re not where we want to be. It’s just life. And well, sometimes life isn’t the way we want it. But, God is still good, God is still faithful, and God is still providing for us.
Are you a grouch? Have you addressed the reason why? I encourage you to be less like Oscar today and see how much better your day goes!